Posted on by Niju Jaya Mohan

The Problem with Better Halves

Nobody is perfect. You are imperfect and you always will be in some aspect or the other; we should celebrate that. You are uniquely you and it is your USP.

There are no better halves. People are not half, they are whole people with their imperfections even. Accept them for who they are before you make them your life partners. Also, don’t look for all your needs in one person. There is a physical limit to which one person can fulfil and enrich someone else’s life.

We are all looking for intellectual, emotional, romantic, sexual, experiential and spiritual stimulation and connection. Understand each other and their love languages. And love (unconditionally – that is for another day); the more you give, the more you receive. If you aren’t receiving enough; then you might not be with the right person…

Photo by Tania Melnyczuk on Unsplash

Posted on by Niju Jaya Mohan

No, you can’t skip to the good parts

It’s 2021 and there is this insane urge for instant gratification as always. Sadly, real life isn’t like that; all good things in life need time and hard work. Unless you are super freaking rich; then all bets are off. But for commoners like us, you can’t skip to the good parts. 

Life as we know it has a series of moments where we feel like we are in hell. Be it a major breakup or losing a job or losing someone in your life; you cannot skip through the pain and come out on the other side where it’s shining and has rainbows. So what do we do in that situation? You persevere and push yourself through it; talk to your friends; talk to a therapist; work on yourself; heal and make yourself ready and worthy of everything that is to come. 

It is a matter of time and the good parts will come to you, then maybe make that reel you know, for validation!

#loverefurbished #love #relationships #breakup #selfhealing #breakups #nijuvenate #journaljourneys

Photo by Paloma A. on Unsplash

Posted on by Niju Jaya Mohan

Grieving your breakup

You must grieve your breakups, space it out before you try to jump back in for the heck of it. Depending upon how important and valuable the relationship was; the period of mourning varies.

Everyone has to go through some or all of these stages of grief: denial, guilt, bargain, depression, coming back up, working through, acceptance.

Find what works for you; have some good crying sessions, listen to sad music, talk to your close friends, talk to your therapist, do some journaling – whatever helps you to grieve your loss. It is a loss, mind it! It will start to hurt a little less tomorrow and the day after and the day after. Some day you will work through it and forget about the pain.

Give yourself time. Grieve your loss. Also, pursue new potential interests when you have done self-work and healed. Otherwise, it’s not fair to the new person.

Now, back at it you crazy lover! I am rooting for you…

 

Featured Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash